Thursday, February 17, 2005
I'm about to go to sleep now but just thought of blogging my boring blog for a while to make it less boring but with more boring entries like this it could possibly make it more boring instead but it's ok cos it reflects my boring life which is the sole purpose of a boring blog.
I really actually can't think of much to blog about. i really actually got a lot of things on my mind which i dunno how to express & find no point in explaining too clearly. i'm like living among the clouds, i can't see things clearly. i feel like a confused cloudy twisted scrunched-up... thing. what is it that i'm so bothered about? i think about it all the time now. i think about it so much that i get tired and want to stop thinking altogether. i'm not really sure of what i want, sorry if my behaviour seems kinda inconsistant. or maybe it's cos i have funny mood swings. see wat i mean. confused twisted. i'm going crazy. i can't seem to pick myself up. i dun wanna sound like i'm whining again. someone please kick me.
I remembered minghui once said that jinling is not an untalkative girl. but jinling seldom talks a lot now i guess. except with certain friends at particular cheerful sessions when she feels comfortable. jinling seems like she can still talk & laugh but she never feel chatty anymore. whywhy?
I never meant to be annoying or hurt you in any way. i know i can't expect you to be so understanding all the time. i'm sorry everytime when it's my fault but i feel like it's my fault all the time. maybe i feel better blaming myself than to blame you. i'm so tired of explanations.
dara lost in [[fairytale]]-land
11:30 PM
